- It was only a problem of language…

the begginig....

They seemed to get along, but that afternoon, something trigger the a reaction that sent him into a spiral that was going to be just the beginning of a storm…

It has been almost 13 months since they met, “a casual meeting” at a bar. He was supposed to be in a Restaurant, having dinner with some of the top lawyers in Toronto. Just happen that one of his best informants, Droma Lavian, insisted in a face to face meeting ASAP.. . He was convinced that most of the times Droma called, was because he felt alone or abandoned by the world and needed company, the one that his personal fortune and charm couldn’t provide that often: brain food.

He has come to this country by mistake, he open his mouth at the wrong time in the wrong place. When his former boss ask who could speak French, he had to be the first to stand up and launch a full dissertation about the French culture and the origins of the International law inside the Napoleon legal system. But at the same time, it has been a re-discovery of him. This time it has been different; he had the inner peace to see things in a different way. Life had been good with him, but also he had been very good at taken advantage at each step. He had taken all the short cuts that he was given with; he had never damage anybody over the course of business or friendship. At some point he tried to remember how many he had brought up with him, because he believed in the “forward god” theory, even before it made it to the movies. But at the end, he had come to the realization that he had also taken a lot from many of them. He had converted too many into different people, into shadows of himself. Mostly for good, they had all come to realize that they were doing great by following his steps or his advice. Most had not realize what finally sank in the last year : he had not build anything for him, there seem to be no destination, no harbor after years and years of moving.

His life was done between work, lots of “friendly” motives to eat together, any one , but preferable dinner. People liked the idea of having dinner with him. He always get them into the best restaurants and knew all the nice waiters and hostess and the best food at each place. He had this effect in people, he may meet them once, but they will never forget. Sweet operator or charmer, or just a natural? He always treated people fairly; never get into arguments with people that cannot defense themselves, everybody is as important as anyone else, and all women are pretty. These were some of the “rules of life” that he learned early in life from his grandfather. Actually it was from both of them. Somehow he was the favorite of the “paterfamilias” on each side of the family. But at the same time he learn to be tough with himself, he would work first then al kind of friend commitments, then fun. He always joke about how much he loved his work, that it really was a lot of fun for him. He believed it, he was convinced that you never work for money, that you work for a cause that you believe in, for something that was greater than you. A job was nothing if you didn’t enjoy it, if you didn’t learn every day something new, if you couldn’t meet people.

At the end, it work for him in many different ways, he seemed to always be at the right place at the right time. Things worked for him. He never was a real cute guy, not as a teenager, not later, but he had that “angel” that will always get him where he wanted.

This time it was no different. Droma was making jokes and seemed to be harassing the very beautiful waiter that was serving them. The place was famous for having all kind of young women serving; most of them, college students that really had a different level of education and could manage almost any kind of customer.

Ann was different; she had an aura that could be seen from miles away. She was different; she had not even talk to him, and he could feel her. When he turn to see her, it was a unique sense of finding something lost.

She had a voice that could match any angel, listening to her he could go back to his early years at the catholic school, where sometimes at mass he will close his eyes and could listen the choir so neat, he could made one voice over the other, and of course, there was this girl from the “sister school only girls” that will join the only boys school that he attended, once a month for the “first Friday of the month mass”. That voice he could never forget. Of course years went by and he moved to Europe and never saw back the

She ask her name, but she just mumble it, then turn and left. IT was obvious that Droma has been the usual jerk. HE will have to do much better this time if he wanted to ust call her attention. But he knew there was something; this was more than just a “coincidence” : things happen for a reason….
It was getting late, and he tried almost everything to get her to talk. Droma kept being a jerk until I force him to be gentle or leave, or I would leave. Droma had seen me before doing stuff like that, so he knew I was talking serious.
He decided that the lawyers were not going to wait for much longer and he really needed to talk to them about the future of some lawsuit that he was planning.
He pay and one of his business cards felt, she took it and gave it back to him, not before reading it. He decided a long shot, he will just leave the card inside the bill folder and wait for results.

Left and went direct to his car. Music came and Toni Braxton came alive, Breath Again went into all its magnitude. To be fair the system of this car was amazing, so it created a sense of floating. Let it Flow was coming in, when he finally got into the Italian restaurant where the lawyers were waiting for him.

“Good night, Mr. Davila , welcome” it seemed that during the last 2 years he was able to create a full integrated image inside the local society. People seemed to recognize him almost any place he went.

The whole idea was to start a controversial suit against the prohibition for companies to advertising certain medical products direct to consumer.
Of course, the American companies have come to find a way to do it in a much more easier way for them : include the spill over on the US publications and TV that crossed over the border.

Well this time, He was trying to get finally something solved, in a country famous for never solving anything : this is the only place of all the ones he had lived in the last 20 years that had a highway that ended in a stop light before accomplishing its objective of crossing in a fast way the whole city. The reason was at the time they have too many arguments by some of the inhabitants of the one of the areas, that dcided they didn’t want the highway to go through their small ecosystem, so they were able to stop the project of Allen Road for more than 10 years, and still waiting.

- Reasons

There has to be a reason why somebody, one day decides to start to write...
Writting is about dumping emotions into a big bucket, that becomes a place holder for one day, domebody be able to understand the process in your mind.
I am not a writer, never pretended to be one, I write in spanish, in english and sometimes in french. It all depends my mood.
I learn those languages by cultural inheritance, born in Mexico (even I hold a psanish passport); raised inside a french family and went to a typical catholic US school.
Young in politics, one day decided it was not for me t change the world and the alternative of being changed by politics was too scary. Also, yonger relationships, that brought me too fast into the world of responsibilities, forced me to take a new path. Use all my "people" charm and knowledge and go and put it in to the service of the owners of capital.
And then finally, I wanted to see the world, wanted to meet new people, new cultures, so the best way was to do it with others people money : go international.
That way, I end up living in the US, in Brasil, in Argentina, in China, in France, in Spain, in Korea, in Indonesia and went to so many other places. I am pretty good at it.
Found love so few times, that it became part of me (not been loved...), and decided to work harder and harder. Not rich, but with enough capital to almost do anything I want, I was frustrated with my heart, until one day I found somebody.
The most incredible, weird relationship was born out of the blue, no sex, lots of laughing, magnetic attracton, vsion of the world so blurry, that we both feel abandoned by the future,
This blog is dedicated to she. It is never intended to be read by anybody (if you are reading it means you really got me drunk ( hey, but I dont drink that much, not been out of control in many, many years...) or you are the person it is intended to be written for.. any how, here are some of my most inner emotions, my real self. Hope that as you go by word by word, you will be able to understand what it is to be so affraid of love...
me, orutra